an ode to my friends

2 Apr

When my sister Alex was 20 she had two best friends. Both died in the same year. The one died of brain cancer and the other died in a motorcycle accident. Both were horrible losses.

What I remember most from this period of her life is her unwillingness to come to terms with the death of her friend who died in the accident. You see, she had been mad at him and they hadn’t talked with each other for a while. Then, one day, a phone call came through. The unthinkable happened. He had been in an accident and instantly died. Just like that.  Without any warning, without any proper goodbyes. She was furious. She was crying and crying and didn’t really stop crying for days. ‘I didn’t get the chance to tell him I loved him’.

Then and there I made a pact with myself not ever to part with a loved one on bad terms. I have managed to keep it throughout the years with a few exceptions (I was 16 at the time).

I have been thinking for a while to dedicate one post a month on each of my close friends. I promise I won’t share too much information as some of you might not enjoy going public. It’s just that I feel I need to get it off my chest just because some things are better left said.

Should you be one of my close friends and hate the idea, kindly let me know. For all intents and purposes of sharing the love I would prefer stating the whole (given/first) name and not only the initial (as I usually do).

Until next time




9 Responses to “an ode to my friends”

  1. ramblingsfromamum April 2, 2013 at 9:55 am #

    It brings great sadness to those that aren’t able to have their last good-byes to the ones they care about or love. I can’t imagine not being around when my parents slip from this earth, to hold their hand, to tell them how much I love them. Tis a good thing you do T and I really liked that poster you put up…considering the events of the last week or so..
    xxx MM

    • wonderlandbytatu April 2, 2013 at 6:47 pm #

      I can relate with what you are saying about your parents. I dread the moment I will have to let them go, I think about it quite often, especially the last few weeks with my mom being in the hospital again…
      As for my friends I have gained a few and lost others over the last twenty years but I feel confident, whole and fortunate now more then ever because I realized once again that quality and not quantity is what really counts xxx

  2. Daphne April 2, 2013 at 4:13 pm #

    I didn’t know that about your sister. How incredibly heard it must have been on her. I think your idea is superb: Friends need to know we love them! xxx

    • wonderlandbytatu April 2, 2013 at 6:52 pm #

      yes, It was an awful year and an experience no 20 year old should ever go through.
      I feel ready to share the love xxx

  3. nothingbythebook April 2, 2013 at 4:47 pm #

    I just love you.

  4. April 3, 2013 at 4:50 am #

    Firstly, how terrible sad for your sister. What a difficult time she must have had.
    Secondly, what a nice idea. I look forward to reading the posts.

  5. sakuraandme April 3, 2013 at 8:18 am #

    Oh NO! How incredibly sad. I agree holding grudges are no good anyway. Hugs Paula xx

  6. meditatingmummy April 3, 2013 at 6:30 pm #

    Oh Tatu, that is an awful thing to have to go through in your 20s. I think your idea is just wonderful. I can count on my fingers how many true friends I now have. Some have stayed and some have gone… I have moved on from a few who are in a different place than I.
    I give gratitude to the friends who stay with me and accept me for who I am and I them. I lost my dad 17 years ago and still miss him very very much. I live far away from my mum, I don’t know what I would do without Skype 🙂 I miss her very much. I can’t wait to read the post you writes celebrating your friends.

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